Attention: Friends

You are invited to

The 4th Anal

Wrap Your Box!
Thursday December 23rd at 6pm
Maison Des Staminas
RSVP REQUESTED

FAQ

I had such a great time last year that I've forgotten what this is... so what's the deal?


Wrap Your Box was conceived 4 years ago when Mr. & Mrs Stamina saw a need for parents and lazy people to wrap their children and loved one's gifts in peace and quiet.

Wait, will there be peace and quiet?

Yes. I Call my shot glasses Peace & Quiet. In case you're wondering I call my biceps thunderbold and lightning. Why, you ask? Because they are very very frightening. Galileo!

What do I bring?

Some wrapping paper, maybe tape. The idea is we all share in each others wrapping paper to have a greater variety under the tree.

But my wrapping paper is from the Dollar Store, is that OK?

Yes, Denis... that's fine.

Did you mean to say Annual not Anal?

Maybe. Depends on how up tight you are. Just relax baby and let it happen.

Will there be food and beverages?

There should be some beer and we will likely order Pizza and hot chocolate. Feel free to bring your own liquor. I am not your Liver's bartender.

Can I bring my children?

Are Reindeers real? So...ummm yes. (They're real right?) Please feel free to bring kids, but you better still have gifts to wrap or the Elf comes out of the closet to give you a Donkey Punch. (Do not google this term)

I have friends who are alone on the 23rd. Can they come to Wrap Your Box?

Would anyone refer to said friends as "Assholes" or "...a real bunch of cawksuckers?" If the answer is no, then bring them along. If the answer is yes, then bring them.

What else will we do that night?

Matt suggested a Key Party last year and that didn't go over well. Not because we didn't want to share but because nobody wanted to end up driving Matt's 1989 Protege.


There is a baby in my vagina. Is it safe to come to this party?

Yes. And, baby's don't come from the vagina. They come from the belly button. Duhhh.

Will your son be there?

Yes. And, he will likely leave a snot stain on your right or left shoulder. He tags all of his victims.

How long will this party last?

Who said anything about a party... it's really more of a hootenanny where grown adults sit on the floor and complain about they're bum and knees hurting while wrapping toys that either talk, bark or light up in strobe-like sequences that an epileptic might consider unappealing.

Can I ring my laptop to do work?

No! Jesus wouldn't bring a laptop the night before, the night before your birthday would he? No he wouldn't.

Who would win in a fight between Jesus and Santa Claus?

Easy. Jesus is a pacifist. So he would Pass A Fist right through Santa's Skull.

Is this FAQ still about the party?

Shit no, I got carried away several questions ago.

Did you ever shit in your hockey pants?

I will see you at the party. Good bye.

RSVP Below.

Thanks,

Management